Between birth and death, we go through various stages and there are a few milestones we pass through. To start with, it is the stage of learning, which lasts for about the first quarter of our lifetime. We all go through it formally and informally, consciously and unconsciously. This is what sets the foundation for the rest of our life. This stage has been referred to as ‘Brahmacharya Ashrama’ in our ancient vedic scriptures.
If we truly understand the objective of education as explained in the ancient vedic system, we will find that we are supposed to learn the following:
- What is life?
- Who am I?
- What is my calling or purpose?
- What is my dharma or duty?
- What is my ultimate goal?
- How does the fabric of society function?
- How do I fit into the society?
- How do I choose my profession?
- What are the different stages of life?
- How do I prepare myself for the four stages of life?
- What are my unique gifts?
- What is the best contribution I can make?
- How do I equip myself with decision-making skills?
- How do I learn to choose and prioritise things in my life?
- How do I prepare myself to retire from this material life?
- How do I live my life optimally?
- What are the Universal values and principles?
- What is the education and skilling I need to excel in my life?
Once we equip ourselves with the above knowledge, we are ready to move to the second stage of life which is the ‘Grahastha Ashrama’ or for family life. When we enter the family life with the right understanding, we are able to go through the ups and downs, the highs and lows of our life with courage, maturity and are able to perform our duties or dharma as a grahastha including the duty of being a spouse, a parent, a care-taker for the elders in the family and establish the family values that lay the foundation for our future generations. Of course, in the midst of all this, we are never to forget the duty we have towards ourselves and most importantly our creator and his creation.
Now, if I were to ask you, how many of the above questions you have answers for in your life with absolute clarity, what will be your answer? Have you charted your life on the solid foundation of real education or is your foundation shaky? Have you made conscious and well informed decisions about life so far or do you feel you have somehow landed yourself where you are? Do you have the right understanding for your future course of action? Do you understand the role of your profession in you life? Is it only a source for earning or is it a vehicle for you to make your unique contribution to the world?
If you are a parent or someone who is intending to become one soon or get married, do you understand what is parenting? or what is marriage? Have you equipped yourself with the required knowledge and skills to be a Conscious Parent or lead a Conscious Life as a family man/woman (grahastha)?
Many of us have whole lot of certificates of education, but are we truly educated? If we ourselves feel ill-equipped to lead a Conscious Life - are we equipped or empowered to guide, mentor or educate our children?
Is it enough for us to blame our parenting, education system, our society, our governments or should we do something about it? Before we march our demanding others to set things right, do we know what is right? Are we right in what we are to do? It may be more sensible to educate ourselves to become Conscious Leaders and see how we can individually and collectively contribute towards building a Conscious Ecosystem for ourselves and for our future generations.
Only when we are Conscious Leaders can we make valuable contributions towards our family, organisation, community, society, country or world per se. As a parent if we are able to bring up one conscious leader to this world in the form of our child, our contribution will be immense and invaluable.
Of all the roles we can choose to take up, parenting is one of the most complex and challenging one. As a parent, we not only have the responsibility of another being but also have been gifted with immense ability to impact and influence the life of our children - whether we know it or not, whether we want it or not, whether we like it or not. We have to be at our best at all times for the sake of not only our own children but for the entire generation of children we influence as an adult, directly and indirectly.
It is not easy to understand ourselves and know what is right for us if we have not received proper education in our early period of life, then we can only imagine how complex it is to take the responsibility for another equally complex yet competent being, who happens to be in our care as our child. We have to equip ourselves with the education and skill necessary to be a Conscious Parent without losing any further time and go through the amazing journey of parenting consciously!
While we are on the subject, I wish to share this important fact that while parenting is important, retiring from active parenting at some point is also critical for your own selves and for the sake of your children adult life. While we have to learn to move on to the next stage of life after we are done with parenting in our grahastha ashram, we have to consciously allow our children to move on from their brahmacharya ashram to grahastha ashram stage of life. If we can live our entire life with one simple understanding that life has to be lived as per these 4 stages and then move on to the next life, we will be able to practice “attachment with detachment” since we will be consistently conscious of the fact that everything and everyone will have to be left behind one day when the right time comes, including what we consider as our own self - our body, our family, our wealth, our status, etc.
Friends, I hope you found the content of this blog not just interesting but useful for you. If so, please do take the steps you need to become a Conscious Parent and be a Conscious Leader of your own self in every aspect of life. Being a parent is the biggest blessing you have received, however, it is also the biggest responsibility you have to shoulder. You have been blessed with what you need as your capacity, but you need to become conscious of it and use all your parenting faculties consciously to make the most of it.
If I can be of any assistance in your journey to lead a conscious life and become a Conscious Parent, please do reach out to me over my email - archana@consciouslivingcenter.in or write to me on my whatsapp number - +91-9686036182.
With best wishes and loads of love,
Archana Krishnamurthy
